The Eyes Have It

This post is all about the eyes.  The windows to our souls.  More importantly, I want to discuss an often overlooked issue with recovering traumatic brain injury victims-visual impairments.  I can best highlight the issues based on what I have been dealing with the past 11 months since starting vision therapy.  When I was evaluated by my physical therapist a year ago, I had no idea that my impairments that caused horrible headaches, sensitivity to light/sound, and ability to read in a straight line had to do with my visual system.  I couldn't track very well either and didn't know that.  Why?  I had been in the hospital following my accident and yet, no one saw these issues with my eyes and visual processing system.  My thoughts were that maybe the impairments hadn't set in a week after my accident.  Who knows?  I NEVER thought it would take this much work to get back on track visually.  What makes matters even worse is that many medical providers don't understand how an issue with visual processing can severely impact how you see the world, interpret data, reading, and even visualizing mentally.

Visual Issues Post Concussion
Let me first say, the medical professionals have come a long way in how they are detecting visual issues post concussion.  If it weren't for the training my physical therapist and speech therapist had received on possible visual issues with brain injury patients, I would have never been referred to my neuro-optometrist.  The first time I noticed I had a visual interpretation problem was when I was reading signs backwards while driving assuming the signs were cursing at me.  I literally read "TIRES" as "SH*T."  What also disturbed me was that I should have caught the clue from the words spray painted on a pile of tires as I drove past a tire shop.  However, my dirty mind, read the words backward then got mad at the store for cursing at drivers passing by.  I'm not even ashamed to admit, I was BUGGING out!!!! 

I made an emergency appointment with my optometrist that next week.  He performed a basic exam testing my eye acuity.  Guess what guys, that was fine.  I had no problems with how clearly I saw an image and nothing had changed with the health of my eyes.  I already wore glasses for distance, so the doctor told me he didn't have the answer for my phenomenon.  So, I thought I was going crazy.  How is it that I was reading things that clearly weren't spelled in the order I read it and then my brain would concoct a story to go with it?  This is where my issues with tracking and eye teaming came to surface.  Because my eyes were not working together as a team, they picked letters, phrases and sometimes paragraphs out of order.  In turn, I would miss the entire meaning of a piece I was reading.  It's very humiliating to read something and still not understand what you read or even gather the meaning of it. 

From what I've been reading on visual impairments, they are pretty common for person with head injuries.  Some of the common complaints are blurry/double vision, sensitivity to light, dizziness while driving, trouble reading/concentrating, and lack of depth perception.  I cannot stress enough that if you have a head injury, please seek medical attention from trained professional who understands visual processing disorders and someone who can offer vision rehabilitation.  This type of treatment trains the brain and the eyes to work together to get stronger.  For me, my eye muscles had gotten weak and didn't want to track and work as a team. 

Vision Therapy Activities
In this activity, I had to scan line with letters and find the alphabet A-Z and circle each letter I found in order while timing myself.  It may seem simple to some, but for a person with tracking issues, it was a challenge.  However, I'm proud of the progress I've made in my vision therapy.  I was supposed to discontinue vision therapy in July, but due to severe impairments shown on my visual perception test, I'm still being treated.  The funny thing is with brain injuries is that you can go on and not even notice some deficits you have until tested.  I perceived I was seeing letters and shapes as others and when I tested in the <1% range, my doctor was even shocked. 

My treatment plan comprised many activities that makes me work hard to focus at near point, fuse objects together, and I even once read letters while being distracted on a balance beam.  I nearly fell into the wall with that activity.  So I've learned with vision, your vestibular (balance) system is also in tandem as well.  This explains the dizziness and the sick feeling I would get when my visual system was pushed harder than it wanted to respond.

ReadAlyzer Goggles Detect Visual Tracking Issues

When you click on the link you will notice two exact passages on the left and right.  It will take no time for you to notice how one side demonstrates the eyes dancing around the page and the other passage shows smooth eye teaming and tracking. 

Me wearing the ReadAlyzer Goggles. 

I find that it is very accurate and it's even more interesting to see how my eyes move in real time.  As I was reading a short story I found myself moving my eyes back and forth over the passages I had just read because I knew I was going to have a quiz afterwards.  My brain could not track and recall what was being read at the same time.  This is why persons with visual and spatial issues post concussion struggle with memory, comprehension, and attention.  If you are too exhausted with attending to the motions of reading, how in the world will you remember what you have read?  This really impacts folks like me who have a job that requires lots of reading and interpretation of medical charts. 

Fatigue: this has also been my cross to bear even visually.  I can watch one TV show and feel like I have been up all night glued to the TV.  It's so exhausting to my system.  Let's not even get into the headaches and the need to shield my eyes from certain forms of light.  Yellow tinted lenses are super helpful and I'll do anything to keep myself from eyestrain.  I used to love reading books for fun and academia, but now, it's such a chore.  This has been the major downside to my injury.  It has taken so much from me.  You guys know I keep it real with you in my blog, and the fatigue has also hindered how much time I can even tolerate the computer.  Preparing a blog post literally takes days.  HUH???? Yes I said days.  Why?  I have to edit all the words, I type backwards, make sure it makes sense and flows well.  I may have a brain injury, but I don't want to write like I have one.  Forgive me for hanging onto a little of my pride. 

In October I was at an outpatient clinic that specializes in testing for brain disorders.  As I was walking down the street for lunch, I came across a sign that really touched me: "Life is Never Falling Apart.  It's always Falling Together."  Boy did I need this boost of encouragement.  I had become so exhausted with this brain injury and how consuming it can be of my life.  My mom was visiting with me and also snapped a picture of this sign.  She is also dealing with the remnants of a stroke and although we suffer different brain injuries, we share so many similarities that helps us understand each other better.  She can look at me and know exactly what's going on.  I don't have to explain that I'm in pain or exhausted.  She knows.  That alone is so powerful.  Having someone understand that you are struggling just to function is such a blessing. 

A lot has taken place in my life since my last blog post.  I'm still on medical leave, will be going back to speech therapy for continued mild cognitive communication issues, ongoing vision therapy, and pain issues.  Though my challenges are many, my focus remains sharp:  finish strong!!!!  This picture below was the encouragement I needed at the exact time I felt the worse about my progress. 

Since the accident, how I view and perceive my life has an even more laser beamed focus than before.  My brain does struggle to process and interpret visual input, but my spirit soars as I am constantly reminded how blessed I am to be alive, have great family and friends surrounding me.  Most importantly, God is still with me.  I can't lose folks.